‘The Traitors’ – What Linda tells us about infidelity

Deception is a fascinating—and frustrating—human behaviour. The popular reality show The Traitors puts this on full display, featuring contestants who must identify "traitors" in their midst. Those of you who have watched it will have seen Linda, who, having just been assigned the role of traitor – in secret – whips her head towards Claudia Winkelman the second she utters the word ‘traitor’ – it seemed so obvious, yet over the course of many, many episodes the contestants continue to accuse the wrong people.   

The reality is: spotting deception is far harder than we think, and our failure to do so says more about human nature than any personal shortcoming.

Research shows that even professionals—like law enforcement agents trained to detect lies—are only slightly better than chance at identifying deception. Why? Because humans evolved to prioritize trust. In social settings, suspicion and doubt can harm relationships and group cohesion. As a result, we’re hardwired to give people the benefit of the doubt. Who’s going to suspect the harmless seeming Linda?

This same principle applies to infidelity in romantic relationships. When betrayal occurs, it’s easy to berate yourself for “missing the signs.” You might comb through every conversation, every unexplained late night, searching for clues that now seem glaringly obvious. But hindsight isn’t fair to your past self. You were operating from a place of trust—a quality that’s essential for healthy relationships.

Instead of blaming yourself, recognize that deception thrives not because of your inadequacy but because trust is a beautiful and necessary aspect of being human. People like Linda—or a partner who strays—succeed in hiding their actions because they exploit a strength, not a weakness.

Instead of seeing yourself as “naive,” remember this: the ability to trust isn’t a flaw. It’s a strength worth protecting—unless you’re a contestant on The Traitors that is.